Gas Mask Bong Review: An Apocalyptic Marvel

If you want to get apocalyptically baked, look no further than the gas mask bong. With a fitted, adjustable rubber mask and durable acrylic water pipe, the gas mask bong is perfect for inhaling intensely while imagining yourself wandering a barren Armageddon-esq wasteland.

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I’ve got to admit, when I first saw the gas mask bong I was a tad intimidated. Even at my edgiest, I still appear closer to an out of work substitute teacher than the villainess of a dystopian sci-fi novel.

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Having purchased more than one Hello-Kitty bong during my adult life, when it comes to paraphernalia, I typically err on the side of tame or girly fare. But hey, chicks and out of work substitute teachers need to get baked too and the end of days is certainly no time to be a narc.

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I set my attenuation’s aside and decided to strap this bad boy on and give it a try…

The Hit

Filling the pipe with water and packing a bowl of my favorite indica, “Willie Nelson’s Private Reserve” into its elephant-trunk like pipe, I felt like I was officially severing ties with mainstream society.

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I made sure to close my eyes before I took a hit, having done a little research on gas mask paraphernalia, with users frequently lamenting that they had forgotten to do so.

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Lighting the bowl, my “trunk” filled with smoke rapidly. Inhaling and opening my eyes, I was violently stoned and couldn’t stop laughing while steadying my wobbling “trunk” so as not to take in any of the bong water.

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I looked down to see my two cats looking up at me like a complete lunatic. I felt truly insane, but in a mostly-pleasant way. I decided to go again.

Design

Though I am occasionally a bit of a claustrophobe, there is something bizarrely comforting about the gas mask. Pondering that the idea of wearing the mask longer felt somehow “safer” than taking it off, I realized how wildly high I truly was. I looked in the pool, admiring its fitted rubber and acrylic canal, smoke lingering in the colored pipe.

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Maintenance

Like other acrylic pieces, the mask is less visibly taxed with each use than its glass counterparts. Parts of the mask are easily dismantled for cleaning the pipe or simply storing it if out of eyesight of more conservative house guests.

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Overall Score/ Recommendations

 

Overall Score: 4.66/5

Functionality: 4/5

Craftsmanship: 5/5

Aesthetics: 5/5

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It never hurts to get in touch with the apocalyptic side of life, and the gas mask bong is both a delightful novelty and a highly effective delivery method. While it’s a tad unwieldy as a primary smoking apparatus, it makes for a welcome addition to the serious smokers inhalation regimen.

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